The Best That I Can...

I find myself uttering these words a lot lately lately. 

I love my daughter more than life itself but sometimes, not all the time, she has a hard time. 

This was not the post I planned on writing today but it sure feels therapeutic to get my thoughts out. 

You see the peanut is going though a very trying day, she testing her limits, she's frustrated that she can get her words out, she's frustrated she isn't quite there yet with things she wants to do physically, and to be honest she's driving me a little crazy. 

I try my absolute hardest to do everything I can in my power to stay patient and calm but sometimes she breaks me. I know she doesn't mean it, I mean after all the girl is only 20-months-old but it's been very difficult. I'm sure I'm not the only mommy out there who has these days. I'm sure we all have our moments. We all want to break down and cry, watch Netflix curled up on the couch with a cup of hot tea under a blanket and sleep forever, but that's not the hand we are dealt the second those little bundles of joy were placed in our arms. 

 I want her to know that no matter what I do try the best to stay calm and collected. Even during moments like today when she knocked the glass jar off the sink and glass and soap went everywhere. I constantly remind myself that she needs my patience and for me to not flip my lid in order for her to remain calm as well, although she does stay remarkably calm even when I use a firm voice.

 My lunch date attempting to escape today...

I have mentioned before about everything I need to do in order to keep myself a happy and pleasant parent, like self-care and the occasional break. But no matter how much I do those things sometimes I just get to a breaking point. Maybe it's the fact that I am with her most every day of the week or the fact that I try to rack my brain trying to think of activities and things for us to do together so that our days go smoother and she gets energy out, but I do find myself reaching my breaking point faster than other days. 

Hoping this little trip with just my husband and I will clear my mind and readjust everything so that when I come back I'm way more refreshed and pleasant mommy to be around. 

Until then I'm praying for patience and doing the best that I can. 

XOXO